May     Starting Out - for real!      Back

Day 1 - 12/5/03

Finally left Wednesday morning May 12!!!! So many loose ends to tie up, apart from the fact that I was no where near organized. Bought myself a camera and hit the road North!!! I thought you were going to Adelaide first you might say? Yes but a quick stop at the Big Wine Cask at Wentworth and then a quick cut back to the Big Koala and the Giant Koala and the Big Wool Bales was warranted. On the way finally got to see the Organ Pipes, passed them so many times had to stop. First use of the stitching program on the camera.

Too far out of the way for the Big Ned Kelly (been there) but right on the way of the

 Big Gum Leaf!!!

Now this is one of my favorites, seen first by the side of the road about 7 years ago, somewhere on the left hand side of the road near Wycheproof.  I couldn't find it on the way up on the Calder, maybe it's on the Sunraysia on the way down. The whole trip will be ruined if I can't find it again!

First night made it just north of Ouyen, home of the famous Lenny's Cabana. Best smoked cabana ever - now closed down. Bush camp off the highway, a bit damp, they had a bit of rain a local farmer told me (stopped by to see what sort of idiot would camp here). Table off the back of the van works (cantilever principle (physics)) had a few quiet argols and played a bit of guitar. No one complained.

Day 2

Reasonably early start, about an hour to Mildura. Didn't go straight in but veered off to Wentworth in search of the Big Wine Cask. Nowhere to be found, even the local yokel at the gas station has never heard of it....bummer. Tooled around and found Perry Sand hills, great spot but no driving on the sand dunes allowed. This is 3 shots stitched together.

Camped out at the junction of the Murray and the Darling near weir 10, pelicans, ducks, possums, a full moon and no body but me.

Day 3

Monster houseboat woke me up. Weet-Bix and coffee (out of sugar - day 3!!) and a wash!!! - too cold for a swim, besides with the house boats and fishing dinghies, I could hear banjos in the background and decided against a full hose down. Asked at the information center (spot the teacher) and was pointed toward the Big Wine Cask!! It's in Buronga!! no wonder. Found that after a very interesting detour through a housing commission area. Photo here gives no justice to the amount of car bodies and general crap lying around. I thought it was the local tip at first until I saw all the (newish) houses interspersed amongst the stuff. Did not stop but took a quick shot from the car.

And then, just as I was thinking "I'm in a tight spot", there it was.......

 so I stopped and bought a postcard. Whew.

Day 4

Recovery day with Amelia and Jeremy. Jeremy is adjusting his chain maille hauberk. He tells me that wonderful street I was at yesterday is the infamous Namatjira Ave. where that baby was killed last year. NO ONE goes in there!! Woops.

Well at 5:00p.m. I find that the local stations were only showing the Melbourne games so.........1 1/2 hours later I was in Renmark watching the Lions beat the Crows!!!! And don't the locals love it. Waited for this barge but it didn't show up.

Day 5 (I can't see this daily shit lasting much longer)

Into Berri for the Big Orange then later the Big Tire, The Big Deck Chair and some dodgy little oranges (see Big Stuff pages). They have a decent collection of Big Things pictures in the Orange, some I didn't have on my list. This trip could get out of control!!

Went to the park to watch Jeremy role play. They do get into it and the amount of work put into the armor is incredible.

The results speak for themselves.

Day 6

I have spent the last 16 hours trying to get this f#@!ing website going. 3a.m. last night and it still wouldn't upload.

Went to see a web guy Paul - great guy - told me straight away that everything I had done so far was wrong. No serious thanks very much, he's in the yellow pages in Mildura and he really knows his stuff. It is now 3:30 Monday after noon and we're about to attempt liftoff. Special thanks to Amelia and Jeremy for putting up with me for the past 3 days, hopefully not much longer....here goes.

YES YES FINALLY. A few touch ups and you'll all know. Just for Liz a picture of Amelia.

Alright Week 2

Finally left Jeremy and Amelia's on Tuesday in search of the Big Murray Cod. Just got across the river and I saw a yabby farm. Hmmmmmmm......I wonder. Roll up and wouldn't you know it....closed! A quick phone call to the number on the sign and my mate Jeff says they do have a Big Yabby inside and to come on in!!! Another X-File solved Scully.

Found a beautiful spot by the Murray at Nyah State Park. 

Dropped in a line and had my first camp oven - a stew with dumplings - but I forgot to buy flour so I called it.....stew.

Headed south for the Big Koalas - one at Dadswell's Bridge and one at Moyston. Found one but the Moyston one was a bum steer. can't believe everything you read on the internet. They probably got it mixed up with the Dadswell's Bridge one as they're pretty close to each other - the towns that is. Got some nice shots of the Grampians and some caves I passed (Byaduk Caves). Great country - lots of volcanics and those great western plains rock walls.

Camped at Mount Eccles N.P. Beautiful 2 hour walk through the lava canals and up the mountain (term used loosely in Australia). Absolutely freezing that night. My new fancy double bag sleeping bag (one inside the other that zips out when it gets warm) works a treat but the wood was a bit wet and the fire was pissy and the whole esky froze again - even though it was on the lowest setting!!) Watch that Dodgy! Had a night visit from some koalas and a possum - who got into the bread. Y.C.  Had lamb that night.

Scraped the ice off the windscreen - a bitch starting the car, there's got to be a trick to this diesel, automatic glow plugs and cold weather - and off down to the Big Wool Bales at Hamilton. A very pretty country town. Passed a group of kids on a school excursion. Wrote a blue slip for some hack out of uniform - instinctive reaction I must get over. Also found a bonus the Big(ish)  Bandicoot at a motel just outside of town. It's moments like this.........

Portland now - and a quick look around town -freezing and windy - I actually put on long pants today!!!! Did a few nice walks along the Great South West Walk and took some pictures of the aluminum smelter. Victoria's biggest commercial electricity rip-off. 

Got a shot too of this pile of sulfur - but the colors do it no justice with the bright yellow and the dark background. Even the latest technology can't beat the human eye.

Camped at Swan Lake on the Discovery Bay N.P. Beautiful Southern Ocean in the background and tons of sand. It is actually a designated dune buggy area - so being an environmentally minded geography teacher I thought - I don't know about you guys, but I'm going the hack!!! All I had to do was make it up this one hill and I could drive the 1 1/2 kms to the beach. Didn't let the tires down because I was just stuffing around but the old pig couldn't quite make it over the ridge!! 3 tries, getting tantalizingly closer each time but no go. In a way I'm probably lucky because the expanses of sand dunes that were there and the fact that I was a good 10 kms from the main road, well.....

Next morning freezing!!! I've been to central a dozen times and this gives it a run for its money, except it's foggy and wet and shitty, just for proof here is a picture of my testicles one morning,....so...........do I want to spend the next 5 weeks doing this ( in the van at 7:30p.m. because it's cold and wet)  or..................................................................................................................................................change my mind and go to CAIRNS!!!!!!!!

Testicles                                                                                                                                    Cairns

A phone call to Liz, change of flight details (she visits next term holidays) and after that, just to make sure, I consulted the oracle. 

I said to Knackers the Magic Moose, what do you think???

 "Screw you guys I'm out of here" -a voice from the dashboard!!!!!!!!  

I'm heading north. Watched the footy  -  Brisbane burying Carlton (sorry Jac and Steve and Gahern) at a pub in Glenthompson with this idiot of a barmaid who had the game live on the radio ( between their horse tipping) but 2 hour delay on TV.  Camped by the side of the road and had more nightly visitors who ate my bread again!! They ought to pass a law.

Next day - a beautiful view of the Grampians. I was going to go in there and drive through but the fog was so thick it would be a waste of time. 

Driving north - the sun broke through just past Bendigo and I haven't seen a cloud since. Camped in a nice sunny spot in              State Park. No pics.

Next day The Big Murray Cod at Tocumwal. A car load of height and English challenged Greeks strolled right in front of old Nessie before I snapped a shot, I asked the clan leader if he could help me out and take a shot - "no problemo maaaate". He took 3 shots and this was the best he could do. (I've patched up a version for the big pages).

Camped by the river at Barooga still cool but sunny and I'm convinced there are no fish in this river.

Driving, driving, driving, hey I've never been to Canberra. Go see my mate Honest John!!! Stayed at a backpackers. SOFT!! Swim, shower, spa, now maybe a rubdown, but the boys in the room didn't sound too keen on that. I hear they've got a job going here that you only have to work for 23 months and they give you 180 grand a year for the rest of your life, plus a free car, plus a secretary, and free travel!! Thought I might have a look into it.....and I love kids too!!

Soooooo, just finished up working - amazing how many people ask you what you're doing when you look like a wanker with a camera hooked up to a laptop in a pub - and they star karaoke!! OH NOOOOOO!!!!! People came out of nowhere. Granted this was Canberra on a Wednesday night - my birthday - and it was happy hour  - $2 schooners. This one guy got into it - Meatloaf songs!!! What a wanker!!! 

so after he sat down and started talking and 2 beers later......................................................................................................................

Oh well you only turn 41 once. Time to get out of town, but first the sights. The National Gallery was fantastic. 2 hours and not a cent spent. Found a display detailing Big Things!!!! Sat there for 1/2 hour copying things out....this trip is getting out of control.

 Hey Wang..it's a carpark!!        Old and new parliament houses. That new fence will keep those pesky terrorists out!!!!!

Legacy of bushfires everywhere out the back of Canberra .....I mean EVERYWHERE!!  Canberra deep space center.  

Namadgi National Park...on the way to the Big Trout.

Had to stop at the Tumut 2 power station. Firstly because as a responsible geography teacher I must inspect this source of renewable energy, secondly as I teach the Snowy River I can claim the tour fee as a tax deduction and thirdly I cooked the brakes in the van on the hills (they were smoking - the worst I've ever seen on a car - I do have a fire extinguisher but didn't use it!

The Tumut River, the Big Apple - took a bit of finding - at Batlow. By now completed a full circuit of the A.C.T.

The McTaggart's of Wybong.                                North to Tamworth, through the Hunter Valley coalfields for the Big Golden Guitar.  See Big Things. Then across to the coast. A beautiful drive through the Oxley Wild Rivers N.P. and a quick stop a Apsley Falls. Talk about shear cliffs - once again the camera does it little justice.

      Stand on this!!  Stopped at Wauchope for the Big Bull. Big Bullshit is what I found - nothing but rugby at the pub and no clues to the big thing. Ended up working in the van - not bad - but I've only got 12 volt supply - so dead battery after 2 hours. Good night - it is now the end of May and I've done about 4000kms and have only gotten to middle of N.S.W.   Oh well, it could be worse........I COULD BE AT WORK!!!!!!!!!!

Enjoy your shitty jobs. See you next month!!!!!!!